The clouds slowly move across the sky. What is moving? Is it the Earth or the clouds? Who can tell?

The Sun provides light and warmth. Many books testify of its existence, but who really understands it’s breadth, depth, and capacity to continue to perform such obligations?

The ground gives way to blades of greenery we call grass, every year, at the same time. Who gives Agrostologist the knowledge to understand the various types of grass and how it grows in regions across the world?

“Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth? Tell me, if you know so much. Who determined its dimensions and stretched out the surveying line? Have you ever commanded the morning to appear and caused the dawn to rise in the east? Have you made daylight spread to the ends of the earth, to bring an end to the night’s wickedness? Do you realize the extent of the earth? Tell me about it if you know! “Where does light come from, and where does darkness go? Can you take each to its home? Do you know how to get there? But of course you know all this! For you were born before it was all created, and you are so very experienced!” Job‬ ‭38:4-5, 12-13, 18-21‬ ‭NLT‬‬

It amazes me how we can recognize that the things that are visible and clearly created are examples of God’s innovative ways but we doubt His ability to take care of us as a loving Father.

Surely He can’t understand that I am lonely and desire to be married- although He has expressed that He is the originator of love.

“He who does not love does not know God, for God is love.” I John‬ ‭4:8‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

Surely He does not expect me to give him a tenth of my earnings. After all, since He is all knowing, He can clearly see that I have a lot of financial obligations.

“Honor the LORD with your possessions, And with the firstfruits of all your increase;” Proverbs‬ ‭3:9‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

No way could Jesus expect me to praise and seek Him in the midst of tragedy, could He? After all, He disconnected the woman who connected me to the earthly realm from the eternal heavens – and she just up and left!

“He who loves father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me. And he who loves son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me.” Matthew‬ ‭10:37‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

It is not that God, our Father is not concerned with what concerns us. He has everything to do with us. He even said that He would never leave nor forsake us. So what exactly is the problem? Why do we question is ability to provide? Why do we doubt God’s omniscience in our personal matters? Surely, there cannot be a problem with a perfect and Holy Father.

Then, the problem has to be within us. It is the inability of a human mind to comprehend things we do not understand and do not fit in our mental box. We attempt make sense of a God, who made this world, in relation to our world. The Earth is the Lord’s and the fullness thereof; the world and they that are in it.

What is the problem? Why does “no” have to mean wait? Why does “yes” imply that WE are not ready?

The area of our lives that cause the most frustration, anger, fear or confusion, Jesus is silent. Why? It is not because He moved. It is because we moved. He is no longer the center of our lives.

Who or what have you replaced Jesus with? Who are you serving? The table is spread, but who are you serving?

“No one can serve two masters. For you will hate one and love the other; you will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and be enslaved to money.” Matthew‬ ‭6:24‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Monday was one of the most hardest things I have ever had to do. The entire week, last week, was surreal, unbelievable, unimaginable, and overwhelming. I knew that this day would come, I just did not know it would be so soon.

As my 13 year old believed, so did I. When my Husband shared with India that her Nanna had passed, she was obviously overwhelmed and stunned. Then she had a look of confusion on her face and says: “Dad, I thought God promised 70 years? Nanna had 9 more years!” How can you argue with God’s word? The conclusion of it all is that our lives are not in our own hands. Everything is God’s timing. He never fails to fulfill His promise.

Tied to the passing of my mother, is a promise directly connected to me! My mother’s death begins the birthing process for my purpose. She will never die. Not only is she resting in the arms of my Savior, but also who she is, lives on through me. 

• What she instilled in me, I pass on to my babies. 
• What she did in secret to connect to the women in church, especially the babes, I must do as well. 

The one thing I cannot continue to do on the behalf of her legacy…is sew. 🤣

Yesterday gave me so much strength. There was a spirit of genuineness, respect and love for my mother. I’ll never forget that feeling. 

So often we act or react from emotion. When the emotion changes, then so do we. The words of comfort we shared, the hugs and smiles, they all fade away. Why? Emotions are temporal and based upon an activity. But just What if…we somehow detached our compassion and sympathy for others when they are grieving and lived like that daily? What would our world look like? Our lives? I know. Can I tell you?

We would then be followers of Jesus. The empathy and concern we show for others when grieving is the true character of Christ, which leads me to believe that we can do this all the time.

“But when He saw the multitudes, He was moved with compassion for them, because they were weary and scattered, like sheep having no shepherd.” Matthew‬ ‭9:36‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

“because we don’t have a high priest who can’t sympathize with our weaknesses but instead one who was tempted in every way that we are, except without sin.” Hebrews‬ ‭4:15‬ ‭CEB‬‬

And when the Lord saw her, he had compassion on her, and said unto her, Weep not. (Luke 7:13, KJV)

What price are you willing to pay to go through the process of truly mimicking the life and behavior of Jesus?

I love you momma. I will carry you everywhere I go. Every victory, every door the Lord opens, you will be there as well. 

Get through the process. 

I have been chosen for His purpose, which then confirms that this all works together for my good and His glory, so I won’t let go.

There is still a process that I must go through, but I won’t let go.

To see the face that greeted me with a smile and a kiss on the cheek, now unable to express emotion- I can’t let go. 

To see the hands that combed my hair, changed my pampers, adjusted my clothing, provided me food, and held me close- unable to move. I still can’t let go.

To see the feet that took me to band and orchestra rehearsals, cheerleading practices and my basketball games, immovable and no longer able to run with me- I still can’t let go.

Having to witness in a few days, the body that carried my body for 9 months, placed in a metal container, lowered into the ground, and never seen again in this form, yet and still…I cannot let go.

The reason why I cannot let go is because you, my Father, are holding me and you won’t let me go. My weakness becomes strengthened through only you. When I feel my knees buckle and about to give way to me falling to the floor and wailing, you hold me up to stand. When my voice is weak and shaky from emotional strain, you speak through me.

I can’t let go…because Jesus, you didn’t let go of me. When I tried to get away from you, doing what I thought I wanted to do, I could not pull away- because you would not let me go.

I would be crazy to think that a Father who has predicated His and my entire existence on love, would desire to see me hurt to the core. Because I know that you are not that kind of Father- a Father who says one thing, and does another…I can’t let go.

I am hanging on by a thread. I am clinging to every prayer, but I won’t let go, because you didn’t let me go.

“For I, the LORD your God, will hold your right hand, Saying to you, ‘Fear not, I will help you.’ Isaiah‬ ‭41:13‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

I fall asleep now unknowingly and unintentionally. When I open my eyes, I tell Him: “Thank you.” The tears begin to fall because I  realize that I was actually awake, although it feels like a dream. I’d send you our funny early morning greeting:

“Hey sugga bear, I love you.”
“Morning snowflake, bubble guts, peach cobbler, banana bread or banana pudding…” (or some weird southern dessert she used to eat).

These last 5 years have taken a toll on you, going from being completely healthy, to us being in the ER at the same time: You for your breathing and me with false labor, with my son. Ma, you know I’m transparent, right? Shoot – I got that from you. Here is how I really feel: “Are you serious lady? You got up outta here like this?” 

We spoke of places we were going to travel together this year. You were determined not to allow Asthma and Congestive Heart Failure to prevent you from spending time with your babies – Nanna’s babies. I never planned to have this many children; but the Lord must have allowed me to, so you could experience the joy of having more than one child. These kids miss you like crazy, Ma. We all have our moments. One moment we good, the next, it’s a boat load of tears. And there is not a question or thought of asking God why – no, I am not bitter at my Father. When I talk to Him now about you, I tell Him: “I trust you, Father.” Sometimes, it’s hard to see through the tears, but when I cannot see, God has promised He will not leave me and that my weakness is strong through Him.

Momma, I am who I am, because of you.

• You taught me how to love people when they hurt me, because you did it.
• You taught me how to take a little and stretch it, because you did it.
• You taught me that having the latest in name brand fashion means nothing, as long as I kept myself looking neat and clean. You could take a piece of cloth and sew anything.
• You taught me to make something of myself and never have to depend on a man for anything, because you did it.

You were such a fragile soul. Even your own siblings did not understand you. The littlest things would hurt you to the core, because nobody understood the burdens you bore when you were little. The story you never shared with anyone, shaped you into the woman, wife to my dad, and mother and grandmother you became.

It’ll never get easy, I’ll just learn to cope.

I thank God for Jesus, because all is not loss. The beauty in this nightmare, is that you no longer have to struggle for breath, because you are resting in the arms the one who has given you the breath of life.

I’ll see you later. Right now, I have some people to reach, some folks to introduce to Jesus the one you would sing your hymns to all through the night, waking up in the morning having your own worship service. I have some lives to touch, some children to raise and a husband to walk in agreement with on spreading the Gospel of Jesus. I already recognized that life is short and things are falling apart in this world, but now, I must be about my Father’s business. There is urgency in my purpose and I will push through this pain. 

When I get there, I need you to find me and hold me. Oh and one more thing. Can you make sure my mansion is next to yours?

“Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you.  And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also. John 14:1-3 NKJV

 

 

Father in the name of Jesus. Lord we thank you for this day. We thank you for keeping us and protecting us in this crooked and crazy world. 

Oh My Father, I thank you for the opportunity to approach your throne. I humbly ask that you would hear this prayer. Most schools are on a break to enjoy the summer. However, it is also a time of year when we see chaos in our community. Lord tragedy has struck my city, as has I’m sure most around the land; for this is all indicative of the times that we live. 

I realize that you said if we turned from our own selfish ways, humbled ourselves and prayed, and sought you, you would heal the land. I also recognize that Jesus did not pray for the world, but that you oh Father, would keep those who are yours and who are not of the world. Lord help us! Help us. Help us to keep one another accountable. Help us to prevent our brothers and sisters from giving in to temptation. Give us the strategy to not only meet people where they are, but also to pull them out of the fire that is a result of sin, and into the arms of you. It seems like every week, one of my children, except my baby, are waking up from dreams, asking me to explain the meaning behind them. What they do not recognize is that you even sent a warning through them, that the end times are near. 

We need you! I realize that I cannot live in this present world without you. It is time for us to make sure we communicate and live this message everyday and everywhere! 

Keep us. Prepare us. Cover us. Help us. Listen to us. Take us. Send us. Teach us. Strengthen us. Comfort us. I do not have to ask for you to love us, because you’ve proven that you already have done and that you are doing that. 

I humbly ask that you accept this prayer. In Jesus  name, amen. 

“if My people who are called by My name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin and heal their land.”‭‭II Chronicles‬ ‭7:14‬ ‭NKJV

• You didn’t get the job, you’re the problem!
• You got the job, but your need is still not supplied (Phillipians 4:6), you’re the problem.
• Your children will not adhere to any correction, you’re the problem.
• Suffering from an illness in your body, you’re the problem!

Remember that time you decided to chime in on something that didn’t concern you?

Remember you had words of discord instead of words of encouragement?

Remember you talked evil against something you had no knowledge of?

Remember you spoke against someone you had no conversation with?

Remember the conversations you had in front of your children?

It is amazing how we have no grace, and yet desire to receive grace.

Some Christians (or at least people who claim to be Christians) speak the truth, but speak it in such a way that it is very hateful.

We are supposed to speak the truth, but speaking it in love. Jesus was loving. Even when He spoke the truth, the conviction of those who did not receive it was from their own conscience and not from rash or harsh words Jesus may have stated. He was intentional, deliberate and matter of fact; but it was still in love.

God spoke the world into existence by the power of His words (Hebrews 11:3). Words do more than provide information. The power of our words can actually destroy one’s spirit, even stir up hatred and violence.

WE STIR UP HATRED AND VIOLENCE FROM OUR OWN MOUTHS!

Jesus said it best: “For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned” (Matthew 12:36–37). Words are so important, that we are going to give an account of what we say when we stand before the Lord Jesus Christ.

The amazing thing about a problem is God always give a resolution. The question is if we will adhere to it. Here is the solution to the problem: Be careful what you speak and how you speak it!

“Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one.” Colossians‬ ‭4:6‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

According to the 2016 Mental Illness Statistics:

Approximately 43.8 million experiences mental illness in a given year.

Approximately 9.8 million experience a serious mental illness that interfere with limits one or more major life activities.

2.6% of adults in the U.S. live with bipolar disorder.

In the U.S. 16 million had at least one major depressive episode in the past year.

Why am I telling you this? How do any of these statistics concern you?

Out of all these millions of people projected to have some sort of mental challenge or disorder, the Lord allowed YOU to have a sound mind.

Sound means: “Something that is in good condition; solid and strong and in good health.”

• You can think on your own.
• You have the ability to comprehend.
• You’re able to obtain knowledge for a particular profession.

I need you to recall to your mind the goodness of Jesus. Something so simple as being able to think logically and rationalize, we give the enemy the opportunity to take that away by being irrational and doing or saying things out of spiritual character.  Are you serious?

During those moments of stress, anger, pressure, fear, exhaustion or when you can’t seem to even think straight – you have been able to pause, pull it all together, organize, prioritize and work through it. Do not take that for granted. 

When we allow the enemy to disrupt our mental state, we are unable to logically think about our behavior and how the wrong or right decision can seriously alter what God has planned for us. Get your mind right and keep it right!

2 Timothy 1:7 (NKJV)
For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.

This devotion was supposed to be available some time Monday; however, I had nothing to write. I always ask the Lord to give me what to say. Nothing came until after 3 am, Tuesday morning. It’s all His timing and His desire and so…it is being made available at this time, as He has given to me.

17 years ago, people were preparing for catastrophic events of epic proportions. Some began replaying and believing the hit song released in 1982 by an artist named Prince entitled: “1999.”

Some predicted major computer systems would malfunction because of the inability to process the year 2000. In fact, I was working in Corporate America, implementing technical projects to account for the change. The problem even received its own name: “The Y2K bug.” Basically, the problem related to world systems calculating calendar data using a 2-year digit vs. 4-year digit formatting (e.g. ’73 vs. 1973). Everything had to be converted to account for all 4-digits of a given year.

Some were out buying water and food for their newly created emergency bunkers, just in case necessities were limited.

17 years later, Prince is gone, everything requires a 4-digit calendar year format as programmed, an African American President has been elected and served two terms in THESE United States and a President who never served in a political arena, is now elected as the President.

In 1997, when I graduated from college, I was uncertain of what the world would look like 3 years later. In fact, after listening to all of the news outlets, I was uncertain if I would even be living. 20 years later, it is 2017. 3 years from this calendar year, I cannot believe that I am fixing my mouth to say that it will be 2020. We are closer to the year 2020, than the infamous millennial scare that never happened to the extent predicted.

As I lay in bed, reflecting on life 20 years later. Married for almost 15 years, 5 children, and 20 years older, living today seems more scarier than ever; however I have the expectation of being here to say: “Happy New Year, in 2020!” That seems so strange. I don’t plan on leaving (shoot, I’ll only be 45) but I can’t fathom 2020…but shouldn’t I be making plans to? I live my life spiritually in preparation to have the opportunity to meet Jesus on peaceful terms, but the day-to-day stresses of life are all plans. To. Stay. Here. What about you?

I recall in the late 90’s there being a since of urgency to establish a spiritual relationship with the Lord. Since the year 2000 has come and gone, the love of many has gone cold.

“And because iniquity shall abound, the love of many shall wax cold.” Matthew‬ ‭24:12‬ ‭KJV‬‬

It is amazing how we can sense that something not so good is on the horizon and yet we do nothing about it. All because we cannot physically see it. We feel it, but we cannot see it. Hmmm- that’s kind of like Jesus. We can trace Him, we can feel Him, but we cannot see Him and because we have not experienced Jesus in the physical realm, the words of God are mere words written in a book, that has been reproduced, although its knowledge and prophecies have withstood the test of time. The words written in the Bible do not produce enough of an accountability factor to keep us spiritually aligned and connected with our Father. We become so easily distracted. There is no fight to separate from sinful temptation.

In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth; that is what the first sentence of the first book of the Bible (Genesis) reads. We sit and live within the creation of God; and this written statement is proof that God is real, yet it is not enough to produce a strong conviction to give up our sinful ways.

In the next to the last sentence, of the last book of the Bible (Revelation) we find where Jesus states: “Surely, I am coming quickly.” Because quickly does not equate to our personal definition, we have become slothful in the business of the Kingdom of God.

“And He said to them, “Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature.” Mark‬ ‭16:15‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

What are you preparing for? Preparation is a long term action. Preparation implies that the desired goal is not immediate, but is in the future. Preparation means that the short term goals fulfill a futuristic objective. Preparation gives way to opportunity. What is the opportunity you ask? Just as you live in a prophetic entity as stated in Genesis 1:1, so shall you witness the physical presence and existence of Jesus Christ.

Don’t miss the opportunity to know Jesus, because your mind cannot process the 5W’s: Who, what, when, where and why.

“I, Jesus, have sent my angel to give you this message for the churches. I am both the source of David and the heir to his throne. I am the bright morning star. He who is the faithful witness to all these things says, “Yes, I am coming soon!” Amen! Come, Lord Jesus!” Revelation‬ ‭22:16, 20‬ ‭NLT‬‬

I am preparing for the opportunity to live with my Savior.

You were born with the potential to live an amazing life. Your journey to this type of  living is about realizing your life’s vision and purpose. 

When you discover God’s vision for your life, you will forever change. You will become more excited to live each day. Your actions will be deliberate. You will begin to think, talk and walk with a different motivation. Your motives will become intentional. You will not allow distractions and discouragements to hold you hostage. You will not allow today’s obstacles to keep you from moving towards tomorrow’s promises.

To progress in any area of life, we must shift our minds to recognize the benefits that will outweigh the fear:

Fear sees the risk!
Faith sees the reward!

David asked what would he received if he beat this giant named Goliath. David took the opportunity to do what others were afraid to do; however, he was already equipped because his experiences had prepared him for this moment. 

Your experiences in life are preparing you for your purpose. That is really the meaning behind Romans 8:28:

“And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.” ‭‭Romans‬ ‭8:28‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

What are you looking at? Do you see faith or fear? It’s time to change the lens.